Gloria

March 1st, 2021

Starring: Keeper (40’s), Gloria (female, sea lion)

The zoo, behind the scenes of the sea lion exhibit.  It’s cave-like, with a pool of water stretching from end to end.  On one side of the area is a door that leads to a series of medical, equipment, supply rooms, etc.  On the other side, a tall rock structure, which the sea lions swim underneath to reach the main exhibit.  For now, the area is empty.  Keeper stands at the pool’s edge in a wetsuit.  In one hand, they hold their cell phone, in the other, a bucket of fish.  They wait as the phone rings.  When talking, their voice echoes through the space:

KEEPER

Hey.

You’re parking?

Yeah good, I just wanted to update.

I’m gonna be a little late.

We had a calf that’s not feeling well, which pushed everything back.

...

I don’t know yet.  I have to feed a few more, then scrub down the back so...I’m guessing an hour, hour fifteen?

I’m sorry.  I promise I planned to be done by

I know but...look I really don’t wanna go into a whole

Yeah but I can’t...I couldn’t take all of today off.  Look what happened, there was an emergency, I needed to

...

But I can’t!  This isn’t school, I can’t just drop things if I don’t like them.

I did.  When we talked about the promotion, I explained very clearly it might be weekends.  I distinctly remember telling you that.  

Then maybe you need to listen more, because I did tell you.  This is the nature of the job.

...

I do.  I am.  I am taking care of our children.  I’m taking care of them right now.  I’m here so he can have his ice cream cake with his friends and open his presents and bowl to his heart’s delight.  That’s what I’m contributing.  What are you contributing?

...

Right.  Right I remember, you’re the victim now.

Well that’s the stuff I have to say to get you to comprehend that!

I don’t.  I don’t like it.  I hate it.  I hate every part of this.

Then don’t paint me like some absentee parent!  I’m gonna be there, I’m gonna make it!  

Like jesus, just give me a chance here!

...

I said, I’ll be there as soon as I can.  Please tell him that.

Will you tell him that?

Ok.  Be there in a bit.

Bye

Keeper puts down the phone, incensed.  A moment later, one of the sea lions swims under the rock and pops up in the pool, next to Keeper.  It seems to smile.  Keeper talks to her like an old friend:

KEEPER

Hey Gloria.  Hungry?

Gloria seems to say “um, yeah.”

Keeper reaches into the bucket and tosses a few fish, which Gloria gobbles.

KEEPER

Why do you think people suck?

Gloria doesn’t seem to have a response.  Keeper throws her one more fish anyway.  She graciously accepts, then torpedoes back under the water and back out to the exhibit.  Keeper watches her go, smiling.

END OF PLAY

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