Hard Knocks
April 1st, 2021
Starring: Teach (late 20’s/early 30’s), Agent (late 20’s/early 30’s)
The front door of Teach & Agent’s one bedroom rental home/apartment, late afternoon. Teach, still in their school attire, walks their bike up to the door, helmet still strapped on. They put the bike up against the wall, then go into their pocket for their key. It’s nowhere to be found. Teach wants to yell, but can only muster an eye roll. They go to the door and knock sharply. No answer. Then another two times, a bit louder. Then a third. Teach then takes out their phone and calls Agent. No answer there. Truly at wits end, Teach proceeds to pound on the door until their fist hurts. Still nothing. They slump in the doorway, forced to wait.
Maybe a minute later, the door opens. Agent appears: Hair wet, half-dressed in casual clothing, half-dressed in dressy clothing.
AGENT
I heard you.
I was in the shower—
TEACH
Where are you headed?
AGENT
Open house tonight.
TEACH
Right that’s tonight.
AGENT
And I’m running late.
Agent walks back in the house. Teach grabs their bike and walks in, putting it against the wall and collapsing into a kitchen chair. Throughout the following, Agent is walking around the place, finishing getting ready to go:
AGENT
Where was your key—?
TEACH
I left it on my desk. I hope.
AGENT
One of those days huh?
TEACH
Yeah, no. Things aren’t good.
AGENT
Quick, what’s the best of the worst?
TEACH
I think they’re cheating.
AGENT
All of them?
TEACH
All of them, in some way. They're either using notes or texting answers or googling, because everyone’s doing better. The class average is a quantum higher than it used to be.
AGENT
Maybe you’re just teaching them better.
TEACH
I’m not teaching them squat. I’m alone in the classroom babbling like a paranoid schizophrenic, hoping someone’s listening. Nobody’s learning anything, nobody’s saying anything, but don't worry, everybody’s scoring great!
AGENT
Then call them out. Talk to the administrators, investigate.
TEACH
I still can’t prove it. It’s sixth grade, how would you even...?
Plus the admins don't give a damn at this point. They’re only concerned if kids are logged on and passing. Survive the year and wait for the Fall, that’s the big formula.
AGENT
So that’s your solution? Go down with the ship?
TEACH
Honestly? Yeah.
If they don’t wanna learn, I don’t have to make them. The negatives cancel out.
…
AGENT
Should I respond to that? Or should I just let you be vulnerable?
Teach leans back in the chair, closing their eyes:
TEACH
The latter. Had my share of lessons today.
AGENT
Good. Because that was ridiculous, and I gotta go.
Teach smiles, eyes still closed, tiring fast. Agent gathers the last of their stuff and stands by the door:
AGENT
Bye.
TEACH
Bye. Go sell a house for me.
AGENT
Enjoy nappytime.
TEACH
Mmm.
Agent opens the door and walks out. They give it two light knocks, then closes and leaves. Teach soon drifts off to sleep: Leaned back, mouth open, snoring ever so slightly.