Typos
March 12th, 2021
Starring: Davis (early 20’s), Professor Keen (55-70)
The humanities building of a (prestigious) university. The office of Professor Keen, a respected, tenured member of the department. Pretty classic setup-a blocky wooden desk, two chairs, a few framed degrees, honors, maps on the wall. It’s late afternoon, office hours. Professor Keen’s scribbling something in a planner when there's a knock at the door. Keen looks up to see Davis in the half-open doorway, shouldering a backpack.
DAVIS
Professor Keen?
PROFESSOR KEEN
Are you my 3:15?
DAVIS
Yes.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Come in.
DAVIS
I’m Davis, in case you—
PROFESSOR KEEN
Right, thank you.
…
So what brings you in?
DAVIS
I was curious if we could go over my midterm.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Sure. Do you have it?
Davis zips open their bag and finds the midterm, sliding it over with the accompanying blue book. Professor Keen gives it a glance.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Well
Looks like you aced the multiple choice and quote ID sections.
DAVIS
Yes.
PROFESSOR KEEN
And that still put you over the 72 average. I hope you’re pleased with that.
DAVIS
I am. But...
I was more asking about the essay portion. The industrial revolution prompt?
Professor Keen flips the blue book to the essay. They see the page and are reminded:
PROFESSOR KEEN
Ah. Right.
Professor Keen keeps flipping through the essay, reading as Davis talks:
DAVIS
I was a little surprised by a D. I felt pretty prepared and...
I’m not here to contest it, I'm just curious what happened. I’d like to someday write for some of the journals you have, so I was wondering what I could do better. Argument-wise.
Professor Keen keeps scanning through the essay, speed reading it in its entirety, then finally looking back up at Davis:
PROFESSOR KEEN
I’ll be straight with you, Davis. This was the strongest essay in the class. By a mile. Actually, it might be some of the best writing I’ve read all year.
...
DAVIS
Really...?
Wow...uh
So um...so why did I get a D?
Professor Keen looks at Davis, a bit surprised they don’t realize:
PROFESSOR KEEN
Do you have a learning disability?
DAVIS
Um...
I mean when I was younger I struggled with my handwriting but—
PROFESSOR KEEN
But do you have a diagnosed disability that’s recognized by the university that I’m unaware of?
DAVIS
...no.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Ok. Then I was right.
You can’t spell.
DAVIS
I...what?
PROFESSOR KEEN
You can’t spell.
The only notes I had were spelling errors.
Keen holds up the blue book to show Davis. The first page, although in legible handwriting, is covered in red pen circles with the symbol “SP” next to them.
DAVIS
...I got a D for my spelling?
PROFESSOR KEEN
You did.
Believe me, I try to give every student the benefit of the doubt. It’s an in-class exam, you’re on the clock, I can look past a few mistakes but...this is pretty shameful.
DAVIS
I—I was kind of in a flow—
PROFESSOR KEEN
You spelled impatience “impatance,” confidence “confidance,” and predicated “pretticaded.”
And that’s just this paragraph.
If you were a dyslexic sixth grader it would be one thing, but this is a 500-level course. At an institution of this esteem, I can’t let this pass.
…
DAVIS
I appreciate the feedback. Spelling’s never been my strong suit, heh.
...
I guess I just—you could still read it, right?
PROFESSOR KEEN
It was difficult.
DAVIS
But you understood the argument.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Very well.
DAVIS
So...shouldn’t I be graded on that? What I say, not how I’m saying it?
PROFESSOR KEEN
How you say things matters.
DAVIS
Not the same. If it was equal, it wouldn’t be the best essay you’ve ever read.
PROFESSOR KEEN
I stand by that. What I can’t stand by is letting you get away with these kinds of errors. If somebody doesn’t show you now, it's going to bite you down the line. Out in the world, there's an expected level of competency when it comes to these things. People your age can’t just get away with spellcheck.
DAVIS
This is some generational punishment?
PROFESSOR KEEN
The opposite. It’s a lifeline. Whether you're flipping burgers at McDonald’s or writing articles for the JGH, spelling is spelling. It’s a baseline human skill.
DAVIS
...I don't think the world would agree with you. Kids learn to type at the same age they write now. Outside of academia and picket signs, nobody handwrites anything. We're only moving further from analog. I know it’s not your normal, but it’s ours.
PROFESSOR KEEN
It is my normal. Despite the hominid you see me as, I type most things just like you do.
But we are in academia. There are standards. And while we are in academia and you are taking my course, I am allowed to set that standard. And that standard is you should be able to spell “impatience” without autocorrect. I apologize if that’s a problem for you.
DAVIS
No, that’s fair.
Davis points/holds up the blue book:
DAVIS
But like the essay says, change happens faster the more machines take over.
Be ready for it. History doesn’t favor those stuck in the past.
There’s a knock on the office door.
PROFESSOR KEEN
That’s my 3:25.
Davis shrugs and picks up their backpack, slinging it around one shoulder. They start to walk a few steps closer to the door.
PROFESSOR KEEN
I do appreciate the lively debate. Sorry to cut it off.
DAVIS
That’s ok. I’m late to my class anyway.
Would you mind writing me a note?
Professor Keen smirks and nods, taking the jab.
PROFESSOR KEEN
See you on Monday, Davis.
DAVIS
Looking forward to it.
Davis opens the door and slips out of the office. The next student pokes their head in the door, but Professor Keen holds up a hand.
PROFESSOR KEEN
Just a couple minutes, please.
The student nods and disappears from the doorway. Professor Keen looks down at Davis’ blue book essay, still open on the desk. They decide to give it another read.