The Lab
August 16th, 2020
Starring: Colette (female, late 30’s) & Gary (male, late 30’s), Dr. Schnauz (50’s)
Doctor Schnauz’s office. Colette and Gary sit on one side of the table, holding hands. Doctor Schnauz sits and listens, holding a notepad.
GARY
Well
Um
…
We’d been trying for about, what, four years?
COLETTE
Closer to four and a half now.
GARY
Four and a half. Sorry.
And at first, we thought it was her.
And then we thought it was me.
And um
And then
...
Gary starts to get red faced, tear up.
...
Shoot I’m sorry
I’m sorry
I thought I could keep it together—
DR. SCHNAUZ
Please, don’t apologize. Take your time.
COLETTE
It’s alright honey it really is.
GARY
I know. It’s just.
It was tough. Finding out we both…
You know
Couldn’t
DR. SCHNAUZ
I understand.
COLETTE
It was crushing. Especially for Gar.
It’s something he’s talked about since our first date.
DR. SCHNAUZ
And you?
COLETTE
Oh, of course I’ve always wanted one. But as we got farther and farther along in the process, I just wasn’t sure if it was worth all the pain.
...
But I think we’ve talked it over, and we’ve looked at our finances, and I see now that it’s the right choice for us.
DR. SCHNAUZ
Well, that’s very reassuring. This process requires so much support, and it’s heartening to see your trust in one another.
…
So I think we’re set to begin next week with sample collection.
Then we’ll move into sequencing and editing the stud’s sperm.
Then we’ll do the same with the bitch’s egg.
Then we fertilize, and put the embryo back into the bitch.
GARY
And then…?
DR. SCHNAUZ
And then…
If all goes well, you two will have your very own genetically hypoallergenic Yellow Lab.
GARY (getting emotional)
A sneeze-free puppy.
Holy cow.
I’m sorry again.
I just...I just never thought I’d actually hear those words.
We can’t thank you enough—
DR. SCHNAUZ
Well, don’t thank me yet. Still a long process ahead of us, but I’m very hopeful.
COLETTE
Us too, doc. Whatever happens, we’re ready for the journey.
Together.