Bump (Part 2)
November 7th, 2020
Starring: Lloyd (male, 50-65), The Bump (20-30)
The suburbs, 3am. A few days since Part 1. This time, we’re in the backyard of Lloyd and Marcia’s house. There’s a door leading out onto a patio, which leads out to a small fenced in backyard. All is quiet.
On the roof, we see The Bump, dressed in all black. They position themselves over the bedroom, then perform one big jump/hop. The *bump*/*thump* is heard. Quickly and quietly, The Bump finds a drain pipe and slides down it, reaching the patio.
As The Bump prepares to slip away, the patio light turns on, revealing Lloyd with his baseball bat:
LLOYD
Hello.
The Bump pretends to ignore Lloyd and scramble away:
LLOYD
I don’t want to call the police.
But I will.
The Bump freezes. They turn around to face Lloyd, who is holding his iPhone:
THE BUMP
Come on.
LLOYD
What?
THE BUMP
You’re going to call the cops.
LLOYD
I’m not.
THE BUMP
This is like the ideal opportunity for you to call the cops.
LLOYD
I’m not looking for a fight.
THE BUMP
And if I wanted to kick your ass by now, I would’ve.
Difference is, you can call the cops.
LLOYD
I won’t.
Not unless you tell me why you’ve been waking me up every night.
It’s been you, hasn’t it?
Same time, same place, making that bump?
The Bump is silent, as if to say, “duh.”
LLOYD
Huh. Knew it wasn’t a possum.
So...who are you?
THE BUMP
Like you said.
I’m The Bump.
LLOYD
The Bump?
THE BUMP
The Bump.
LLOYD
Are you alone?
THE BUMP
On this block. There’s one of us for every street in the area.
LLOYD
So you’re like a...gang?
THE BUMP
A Society. The Society Of Bumps In The Night.
LLOYD
And what do you do?
THE BUMP
We go bump.
LLOYD
Bump?
THE BUMP
Bump.
LLOYD
No looting?
THE BUMP
Just bumping.
LLOYD
Just...waking people up?
THE BUMP
Some people.
LLOYD
Who are some people?
THE BUMP
Your people.
LLOYD
And who are your people?
THE BUMP
Not your people.
LLOYD
Different part of town?
THE BUMP
You could say that.
...
LLOYD
Ok.
Why do you bump me?
THE BUMP
Because you bump me.
LLOYD
I’ve never bumped you.
THE BUMP
You’ve profited off centuries of systematically bumping me.
LLOYD
Have you seen the sign in my yard? I don’t want to bump you!
THE BUMP
It’s not about if you want to bump me. You are without trying.
LLOYD
But you’re bumping to conclusions. You’re bumping me before you even know me!
THE BUMP
Listen.
LLOYD
I’m trying to—
THE BUMP
No, listen.
…
It is so quiet out here. Sometimes I’ll climb on a roof and just sit in it.
I get mad. People can spend their whole lives with no noise and never know the difference. That’s why I bump.
LLOYD
A privilege check.
THE BUMP
A wakeup call. A break in the quiet.
Not forever. Just for a minute.
LLOYD
Does it make you feel better? That if you bump me enough times, I might get it?
THE BUMP
Maybe. But it helps me feel like someday you might.
…
…
You gonna report us?
LLOYD
I don’t know. Not sure anyone would believe me.
Will it stop?
THE BUMP
For a while. I’ll probably get reassigned to a new block.
LLOYD
And then…?
THE BUMP
I don’t know.
Like I said, I’m just The Bump.
…
LLOYD
Well
I wouldn’t want to keep you off your schedule.
THE BUMP
Too late.
But yeah. Thank you.
LLOYD
Alright then.
THE BUMP
Ok.
LLOYD
Goodnight.
THE BUMP
Goodnight.
The Bump vanishes, into the night. Lloyd watches them go. He pinches himself a few times.
He still might be dreaming.
All is quiet again.