Loser

October 12th, 2020

Starring: Fan & Ban (both 21+)

A sports bar.  Fan sits at the bar, watching the game.  Ban gets to the bar and orders a beer, looking at the game while they wait.

BAN

Who’s winning?

FAN

Not us.

BAN

They seem to never be.

FAN

Not our strong suit, no.

BAN

It’s bad for people.  All this losing.

FAN

I’m used to it.  

BAN

It’s almost like you like it—

FAN

I want us to win—

BAN

Just pick another.

FAN

That’s not how it works.  You don’t switch schools every time you do badly on a quiz.

BAN

You do if you’re flunking everything.  And all they do is flunk.  Week in, week out, forever.  

It’s traumatizing.

FAN

Imagine the players—

BAN

Fuck the players.  Fuck the whole operation.  It’s their job to win.  And if they lose, they still get their money while you get nothing. 

FAN

But someday—

BAN

Brainwash.  They don’t support you, but if you don’t support them, you’re the traitor. 

FAN

Yeah.  That’s how it goes.  

...

BAN

Will anything I say convince you?

FAN

Probably not.

Ban stares back up at the game.

BAN

Well

That’s foul.

Ban gets their beer and walks away.  Fan doesn’t notice.

FAN

No, it’s fair! See look!?  They scored!

Fan turns to see that Ban is gone.

FAN

They scored...

END OF PLAY

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