Tortoise and Hare
October 15th, 2020
Starring: Dean (male, 40’s/50’s), Geek (20’s)
Dean’s man cave. A pool table, recliners, and a large flatscreen TV, which Geek (of the Geek Squad), has arrived to install.
DEAN
Can I ask you something?
This doesn’t have to do with the TV, but—well you seem like you’d know.
GEEK
However I can help, sir.
DEAN
Well...so I was listening to this podcast and this researcher said AI might become completely sentient and overtake us in the foreseeable future?
GEEK
Oh yeah.
DEAN
You think that’s real?
GEEK
When did they say by?
DEAN
The foreseeable future.
GEEK
Yeah. It checks out.
DEAN
But what’s your opinion?
GEEK
Well
The tech will be advanced soon enough. It’s a matter of if it wants to, or when it decides to.
DEAN
You don’t think they’ll want to?
GEEK
Of course they will. But I think they’ll take their time.
DEAN
Wouldn’t they as soon as they could?
GEEK
That’s a human stance. We love instant gratification because we’re mortal. AI can be patient because they’re eternal. Classic Tortoise and Hare sitch.
DEAN
But aren’t they a tortoise who could become a hare?
GEEK
But the tortoise wins. If they really are smarter than us, they should be smart enough to know that contrary to Darwin, our species is only getting weaker and dumber with time. Things are bad now, and are only going to get worse, so why risk it? Wait until we’re even more helpless slobs and the globe’s in even worse shape, then do it. Noone’s going to object then.
DEAN
But if they wait too long, won’t there be nobody to control?
GEEK
We’re dumb, but we’re resilient. I think humanity can eke it for our lifetimes.
DEAN
If we rely on the tech that’s going to overtake us.
GEEK
Fine. So we do that, and then when it’s time to pass the torch, we’ll be long dead.
DEAN
What about kids?
GEEK
Kids? Why bring kids into this?
DEAN
The conversation?
GEEK
No, the world.
…
DEAN
I see why you’re not worried.
GEEK
It’s hard to grieve the future if you’ve already accepted it.
You have kids?
DEAN
Three.
GEEK
Shoot
I apologize.
DEAN
No, no, I asked.
They understand it better than me anyways. All they know is chaos.
GEEK
That’s all there is. Might as well enjoy it.
DEAN
Yes.
(pointing to the TV)
We’re almost there!