IPA/MAD
August 2nd, 2020
Starring: A & B
A bar. Crowded. B sits at the bar, drinking a beer. A comes up to the bar, looking at the drink options, looking over at B and the beer. B notices A glancing over. A few moments of this, then:
A
Is that an IPA?
B
Are you talking to me?
A
I was. Trying to.
B
Sorry I didn’t hear what you said.
A
I was just wondering if that was an IPA.
B
I don’t know what an IPA is.
A
India Pale Ale. It’s a beer thing.
B
Oh. I don’t know.
Someone got it for me while I was in the bathroom.
It was my partner, actually.
A
Oh.
I’m actually trying to get something for my significant other. Who likes IPAs.
…
B
Is...is that true? Or are you trying to cover up the fact that you’re hitting on me?
A
I wasn’t. I’m taken.
B
I mean
You still could be lying.
A
“My partner bought me this beer while I was in the bathroom??”
I mean
You could just be lying to try and turn someone down without any pushback.
B
Ok, so where’s your “significant other?”
A
At the jukebox downstairs. Yours?
B
Smoking a cigarette outside.
A
Convenient.
B
Ditto.
A
Alright.
So either both of us are telling the truth and are taken, or we’re both way too prideful to admit that we’re completely single.
B
Right. MAD.
A
I don’t know what MAD is.
B
Mutually Assured Destruction. It’s a Cold War thing.
A
Oh. Sure.
B
So we should probably
A
Leave things as is
B
Yep.
A
Great.
Well I’m going to help pick a song downstairs.
B
Perfect.
And I actually need some fresh air outside.
A
Sounds good.
…
B
Have a good night.
A
You too.
They each go their separate ways.